| | Hell is oneself. Hell is alone, the other figures in it merely projections. There is nothing to escape from, and nothing to escape to. One is always alone.
Three months ago, I moved to the city that never sleeps, the center of the of almost everything on this earth. I surrounded myself with 9 million other people, and told myself that I was moving forward with my life. This time, I told myself, I would be the one outgrowing the past, moving on. New job, new town, new life.
Two months ago, I realized how wrong I was. I realized that I didn't know anyone in this city, and that my lifestyle did not afford the circumstances necessary to recreate a new social base. I comforted myself, knowing that I still had my foundation from past years to return to. I still had my stability, my safety net.
One month ago, you told me that you thought it would be a good idea if we didn't speak again. I respected you. I respected her. Friendship was important to you, and I always understood that. Just not my friendship. We haven't spoken since.
l'enfer, c'est les autres
I don't care to try anymore. This is me, moving on.
Eight years ago, I learned that you don't have to be a bad person to hurt the people that you love. It's easy to justify, when you want to believe that you're doing the right thing. Mind over matter. We can always justify ourselves, because nobody wants to be a bad person. The truth is though, no matter what we tell ourselves, we hurt those we love most when we don't care enough to protect them.
Hell is being alone, when surrounded by people.
Every moment is a fresh beginning.
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| | Posted 9/8/2008 11:12 PM - 9 Views - 2 eProps - 1 Comment
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